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‘We can’t be seen as cheap’

Money matters when preparing an upper middle class Batak wedding in Jakarta

Deasy Simandjuntak

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   Dressed to the nines: weddings of the rich combine extravagance with

   tradition
   From the private collection of Mrs. Putri Anna Sylvia Siagian-Simanjuntak

Conspicuous consumption and displays of luxury are emblematic of Jakarta’s upper middle class. Higher education, the cultivation of distinguished acquaintances, holidays abroad, a large house in a gated community, expensive cars – all are must-haves for those wanting to belong. These things set them apart from the kampung riff-raff, who do not seem to prize private possessions. However, this does not mean one can ignore traditional practices, or adat. Especially not when there is a Batak wedding.

Sandra Sitorus had just returned home from Europe after completing her master’s education. On the first Sunday after her arrival, she could be seen reluctantly trailing behind her parents to the Batak Protestant church that the family frequents in South Jakarta. The family wished to parade their daughter as a talented young lady with an overseas education. Moreover, friends and relatives should know that Sandra was still single.

Unfortunately however, most relatives pitied rather than admired Sandra. She was in her late twenties, with a darkish – not quite desirable – facial complexion. And she seemed uninterested in romance. Most other females of her age in the extended family had found a husband, and the rest were in long-term relationships. Some aunts, determined

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